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Magnus

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Magnus lives in Semarang, Indonesia. He is currently managing the family's business together with his dad and his elder brother. Magnus enjoys reading and recently he started writing his personal reflections.

We all wear masks, and the time comes when we cannot remove them without removing some of our own skin. – André Berthiaume One my favorite TV show as a kid is a film called Masked Rider. The very first installment of the Masked Rider series introduced us to a man called Takeshi Hongo. He’s a kind hearted gentleman who loves motorcycle. One day, as he was practicing some motorcycle stunts, he was attacked by a group of men dressed in black. And after beating the shit out of him, the men in black brought Takeshi to a secret laboratory and turned him into a cyborg (gasp)… As the men in black were about to erase his memories and turn him into a full cyborg, Takeshi was rescued by a professor (who apparently is his friend) and escaped the facility. However, just as they were about to successfully escape the…

“ The idea that the more you pursue feeling better all the time, the less satisfied you become, as pursuing something only reinforces the fact that you lack it in the first place. ”- Mark Manson One of the most thought-provoking revelation about human desire is that the fulfillment of it, takes away every ounce of happiness and meaning it promises.  To put it in simpler terms, the fulfillment of desire creates an empty vacuum that should be replaced by another (usually bigger) desire. According to Psychologist, Dan Gilbert, this is caused by our mind ‘s emotional homeostasis system- an emotional regulatory system that constantly neutralize our extreme emotions. This is why heartbreaks don’t feel as painful as time goes by. This is why lottery winners’ joy doesn’t last long. This is also why the happiness we get from fulfilling certain desires does not last long. So if fulfilling a…

“Death is the light by which the shadow of all of life’s meaning is measured. Without death, everything would feel inconsequential, all experience arbitrary, all metrics and values suddenly zero.”- Mark Manson Living in a modern world, far from dangerous animals, wars and threatening diseases, it’s easy to think that we’ll live for a very long time. It is no surprise then that many modern human squander their time on empty pleasures and meaningless stuffs; like a son of a rich businessman squandering his parents’ money on a 3 days trip to Las Vegas. A life of safety creates an illusion of immortality, and this is a very dangerous belief to adopt. Here’s why… Although modern medicine have increased human’s average life expectancy to 79.3 years, average human will spend 7.8 hours/day sleeping, 1.8 hours/ day on household chores and 1 hour/day on eating and drinking. While our life expectancy…

“If you don’t love yourself, you cannot love others. You will not be able to love others. If you have no compassion for yourself then you are not able of developing compassion for others”- Dalai Lama Remember that time you told yourself to be patient the next time your girlfriend said something stupid, only to lash out hours later when your girlfriend said something stupid? Or, remember that time you reminded yourself to talk to your staff with grace, only to act like a mad dictator when you found out that they make an insignificant presentation error? All these are strong signs that you don’t understand how compassion actually works… The Dalai Lama once said that you can’t love others well until you can love yourself well; and you can’t give other compassion until you can develop compassion for yourself. Hence, the key to become a more compassionate person is…

“Desires are only the lack of something: and those who have the greatest desires are in a worse condition than those who have none, or very slight ones.”- Plato. The pursuit of desire is a very tricky subject. Too much and it will burn you with obsession, too little and you will not get what you want. How many times have we seen one man’s or woman’s obsession to achieve something great end up hurting them? These people sacrificed their health, family, friendships, happiness on the altar of success; believing that eventually, the end will justify the means, but they ended up miserable, lonely and sad… Or consider the old cynics who live a very sedentary lifestyle, asking you why you worked so hard to achieve X when everything you do will eventually be pointless. As annoying as those people sounded, they are actually pretty spot on on this subject.…

“My formula for human greatness is amor fati: that one wants nothing to be different, not in the future, not in the past, not for all eternity. Not only to endure what is necessary, still less to conceal it – all idealism is falseness in the face of necessity -, but to love it…” ― Friedrich Nietzsche In life you will go through three kinds of situation: Things that you have full control over, which in this case, you need to take the most effective action to reach your goal. Things that you have partial control, which in this case, the best course of action is to internalize the goals (focusing on what you can control). And things that you have no control over, which we will discuss fully today. Most people don’t find it hard to deal with the first two situations, but when we are talking about the…

“Insecurity, anxiety, and depression are incredibly common in our society, and much of this is due to self-judgement, to beating ourselves up when we feel we aren’t winning the game of life.”- Kristin Neff Recently a new belief has been spreading around the world like a contagion, infecting young minds with affirmations like ‘I’m special’, ‘I’m unique’ and ‘I’m different’. Although the desire to feel special is understandable, it pose a little problem. By definition, it’s impossible for everyone to be above average at the same time. Of course we can always work hard and give our best, but even then, there will always someone smarter, prettier, and more successful than you. In her book, Self Compassion, Kristin Neff said, “Even if we do manage to get our act together, the goalpost for what counts as good enough seem always to remain frustratingly out of reach.” Nowadays, it is not…

“There is no good or bad without us, there is only perception. There is the event itself and the story we tell ourselves about what it means.”- Ryan Holiday. What usually cause a situation to turn into a problem is our perception, or to put it simply, the way we see the situation. Our perception colors our emotion, and as a result, it eventually affect our whole decision making process. With the wrong perception, we can make mountains out of molehills, fear something that doesn’t actually exist and worry about things that we have little control over. For example, if we see our colleagues snide remarks and curt response as a form of personal attack, we will probably look for ways to return the attack and escalate the conflict. We become embittered and pass on those negative feelings to people around us. But if we held back our judgement and…

“Psychologists call this habituation, economists call it declining marginal utility, and the rest of us call it marriage.” ― Daniel Gilbert, Stumbling on Happiness Have your ever bought an I-phone in great exhilaration only to start treating it like your father’s beat up Nokia months later? Have you ever bought a beautiful house on top of a hill, only to treat it like a hotel room months later? Have you ever thought that you have finally found the love of your life, only to treat him or her like your personal assistant years later? Well you are not alone, I and the rest of humankind share the same predisposition towards new things just like you do. We just seem to be never satisfied with what we have. Psychologists called this phenomenon hedonic adaptation. This according to psychologists, Daniel Gilbert, is our tendency to quickly return to a relatively stable state…