The Heart of Great Relationships: Vulnerability

Google+ Pinterest LinkedIn Tumblr

“You cannot be an attractive and life-changing presence to some women without being a joke or embarrassment to others. You simply can’t. You have to be controversial. You have to polarize people”- Mark Manson

At the heart of a well functioning relationship is vulnerability, the ability for two people in the relationship to be themselves, without pretense. 

This is very important in a relationship because without vulnerability, a relationship will become hollow, superficial and shallow. The interaction became dull and you are constantly second guessing your partner’s identity because you don’t know them.

If you can’t be yourselves with your partner, you are in trouble. If you can’t share your problem with your partner, you are in trouble. If you can’t show your bad side to your partner, you are in trouble.  A relationship centered on pretense is a very tiring one.

Acceptance is the foundation of a strong relationship.

That is why in his book Models, attracting women through honesty, Mark Manson argued that the dating trend to put your feet forward is detrimental to the health of the relationship in the long run.

Instead of playing the mating game, where you try to be someone else to gain the love of someone else, Manson argued that you should put your skin in the game and be yourself.

Yes, showing this authentic self to a potential mate means being rejected by many people- a lot of people will not like the real you.- but in the long run, this will make room for someone who can accept you for you are.

A person who is worth the wait.

To love is to risk, one can’t expect to enter a good relationship without putting their hearts on the line.

“But you don’t understand.” you might say. “I’ve been waiting my whole life and yet and I can’t find anybody who likes me for who I am. What should I do?” 

The short answer is logistics and self improvement; two topics that we will delve deeper in the next few weeks. Stay tuned.

I hope that you find this article useful and if you wanted to delve deeper into this topic, do read the book “Models: Attract Women Through Honesty” By Mark Manson that greatly inspires this article. You can get it here or anywhere else you get your E-book.

Lastly, if you wanted to get my next article earlier, leave your email on the subscribe box below. By subscribing to this blog, you will get my latest Ebook- Threesome (It’s still in Indonesian) and one bonus article every month.


Magnus lives in Semarang, Indonesia. He is currently managing the family's business together with his dad and his elder brother. Magnus enjoys reading and recently he started writing his personal reflections.

Write A Comment